THE “BEAUTIFUL” SILENCE…(The Ruffled Pages)

So, as the clock approached 9:00 P.M., I parted ways with you,I was happy I got an entire amazing day to spend with you…the best part being that you enjoyed with me . The ecstasy on your face made me feel complete and every time your eyes glowed, I thought maybe I was the right one,your right one! As I was going you called me,”Hey!”,I turned around and asked what.”Bye!” ,you said with a beautiful glimmer in your eyes,I smiled and waved .I thought that finally I wasn’t the only one hiding her feelings behind a veil of indifference,maybe you did it too-and being better than me in every sphere-you were better at this as well. I was on a celestial throne, the smile refused to leave my countenance . The next morning a very weirdly pretty but silent morning I expectantly waited for you-you came but your face-they resembled the dark sky before it rained, I knew something was wrong but after yesterday, I was sure I would be able to talk you into telling your issues and maybe I might be able to solve them as well! I greeted you cheerfully, my heart thudding loud enough for me to hear its beating . you did not really reply, I gathered all of my courage I ever had and decided to ask you what the matter was, whether you were fine . You snapped, it was expected but not anticipated- you snapped saying that nothing wax wrong and that I should mind my own stuff ; as you snapped ,something inside me gave away, as if a small dagger was inserted into my torso-a heated one . My eyes started welling and a strange overwhelming feeling made me short of breath . Yesterday flashed in front of my eyes , and I felt how irrational was I to think of a mundane day-out as a special date . It felt as if suddenly , I was brought back to my senses . It hurt but it wasn’t the first time-this had happened several times before . I collected myself, concealed my misery and put up my regular indifferent facade . I came back to you and sat beside you without uttering a single word . I thought 7 hours of silence would be deafening but ludicrously , I found it beautiful-I knew I would never be able to figure out your feelings for me but at that moment I was absolutely sure I bequeathed you with what you desired . Done with the day , we were going to part our ways again , for once in the entire day-you spoke.”Hey! Listen! “,You said . I turned around asking what-strangely enough my facade giving away-”Bye”, you said , I smiled with difficulty and waved -but wait! Today it wasn’t just that, I saw you hold your glance on my face for a little more than you usually did . I looked up and in your eyes, I saw a strange helplessness fused with contentment . I for a moment saw my feelings mirrored in your eyes the same pain which I felt throughout the day , the same craving to stay a little longer and then we turned away to go our respective ways . Today, oddly, I felt more sure than yesterday about the part that maybe even you felt the way I did, even you craved me bit by bit , even you loved my presence the way I loved yours but then I did not know as the precondition of this sentence was a MAYBE…

Published by shachi_sinha

An engineer who is making an endeavour to pen down her unsaid emotions and her midnight musings with an effort to connect with all of you out there.

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