ACTIONS LOUDER THAN WORDS (The Ruffled Pages)

An year and a half had passed by since we first met- I was still hopelessly in love with you and you were still not ready for any commitments .Moreover, you still did not know that I liked you .My biased behaviour towards you often had several people guessing that I tended a soft corner in my heart for you but hey! I won the best actor award in my school times for seven consecutive years for a reason! I was an expert in hiding my feelings and I had mentally agreed with my mind on not making a public exhibition of my feelings for you as long as I did not come to know how you felt for me and whether you reciprocated my feelings or not, because I really did not want to ruin the special bond we shared . The only person who knew how I felt was my best friend and I had sworn her to secrecy that she would not utter a word about my feelings to anyone. However, she strongly believed that you too liked me but you were reluctant in taking the first step. The small coterie of friends we had were clueless about my feelings for you and I wanted it to remain that way. It had been an year and a half and now my best friend really wanted me to move over you since neither you nor me were ready to confess our feelings to each other. A month ago, our group got acquainted with my best friend’s cousin, Armaan. An enchanting and vivacious personality, Armaan charmed everyone with his quick-witted persona and an understanding outlook towards others. You and Armaan became good friends as well. While Armaan took an instant fascination for me, I was apprehensive of him initially. However, once we started interacting, I took a liking to him as well, although my liking for him was not a romantic inclination at all, it was more of a like-minded companion with whom I could share all my ideologies and discuss the ideas of my mind. Initially, you did not pay heed to the bond Armaan and me shared but as it deepened, the discomfort was evident in your eyes but you always liked portraying that you couldn’t care less. Thus, in a month, Armaan had become an integral part of our closed-knit group. Today, all of us were supposed to go in this fun fair held in the city to which all of us had got free passes and even Armaan was coming with us to the fair. As we went to the fair- it was a different world altogether with fun rides, street food and super amusing games. Thus, all of us decided to play the group games and win fun goodies. As we posed for a fun photo, the entire group received a cool coffee mug as prize. As soon as we received the coffee mug, Armaan and me started bickering like kids for the coffee mug and we started snatching the coffee mug from each other-all in good humour. However, suddenly you became very annoyed and you snatched the mug from Armaan’s hands and asked us both to stop behaving like kids publicly. Everyone was shocked seeing this behaviour of yours but they thought maybe you were just in a bad mood. I glared at you but you avoided eye-contact with me. After a while, we all bought fries from a takeaway shack and Armaan and me, we started the squabbling again. Armaan stole my fries and I chased him all over the place. Your face was protruded and you looked like a sullen child whose favourite toy had been snatched from him. After our chase was over, we came back and your eyes resembled the sky before a thunderstorm. Armaan tried talking to you but you snubbed him publicly. My best friend and myself, we understood what the issue was but I concluded that maybe I was over-thinking way too much to even think that you were “JEALOUS” of Armaan. After a while, all of us went to play one last fun game-the funniest game of all, were all of us were supposed to balance and sit on top of a monkey bar and fight with each other using a pillow in such a way that the opponent fell from the monkey bar. The one who managed to stay affix on the bar till the end will be the winner of the group and would get a prize. Thus, all eight of us participated in the game and gradually everyone fell off the bar including you. Finally, only Armaan and me were left in the pillow fight. As we tried defeating each other, both of us were having the time of our lives. We were playfully fighting each other off. All of our friends were enjoying the fight as well when suddenly, you stepped forward and pushed Armaan making him fall from the monkey bar and you said, “That’s it! game’s over! She wins!”. Armaan gets up angrily and looks at you but refuses to say a word. I looked at you but you again avoided eye-contact with me. Everyone in the group was dumbstruck because of your act and your best friend gave you a skeptical and enquiring look, but you refused to acknowledge his enquiring glances. I was still in a state of shock when I suddenly looked at my best friend and saw her grinning mischievously. “You know!”, she suddenly exclaimed, “I have heard jealousy exists only where there’s true love”. My heart skipped a beat and I was flushed. I looked up at your face and saw the same expression mimicked on your face. That’s when my heart replied in affirmative to the question, I had always been asking it, “Did you really like me?”

Published by shachi_sinha

An engineer who is making an endeavour to pen down her unsaid emotions and her midnight musings with an effort to connect with all of you out there.

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